Leftover Madness

We went over to the Berman's in Lake Merrit for Rosh Hashanah dinner which was fabulous. They did such a nice job with my worst enemy- cat hair and a fantastic job with the dinner. Matzo Ball Soup to start followed by apples, honey, challah bread, chicken, and delicious brisket.

I am so hoping I get invited over next year.

Eating fabulous leftover brisket, potatoes, and kugle.

Haha Owen there ain't no food left for you.
  • Current Music
    Still Twisted Sister

I am a Business 2.0 widower


That sweet man I married is still at the office. Well, at least he better be at the office. Oh God, what if he's not at the office. Where is he?

I guess I am available for going out for drinks and fun if this schedule continues.

  • Current Music
    The Best of Twisted Sister

Oh Big Eden...oh snow capped mountains...oh sweet kiss on a dancefloor

Tonight I saw one of my most favorite films of all times- Big Eden. It's one of those movies that is a dream- a wonderful dream about life with all of its ups and downs. It's the story of a NY artist who goes back to Montana to help with his grandfather who has had a stroke. Immediately he is surrounded by a family of friends and is torn whether or not to return to NY. He eventually falls in love with a guy but I won't spoil the surprise if you decide to see it.

With all the trash out in the theatres these days, it's such a breath of fresh air. I am afraid though it will remain one of my dreamy favorites as owenthomas and I would never be able to dance underneath those mountains some warm Montana night and kiss right in the middle of the dancefloor. A boy can continue to dream though.

Of course, I know it would never happen as Owen would be going into shaky withdrawals like a heroin junkie without his bloody Internet connection.
  • Current Mood
    hopeful hopeful

Less screaming at Sprint & 10 servings of fruit and veggies

Dear dear ones:

Well there was less screaming at Sprint today as they exchanged my old satanic version for the more sublime model that hopefully won't ring at inopportune times. Owen has really escaped a lot of wrathful tirades. Lucky him. So far not even a peep from the phone. Life is sweet.

Believe it or not I had 10 servings of fruits and veggies per day. I am a star in my weekly fat class eventhough I was kind of grumpy. I didn't mean to be it just happens sometimes. Maybe the meek will inherit the earth but course leaders at weekly nutrition maintenance classes go straight to heaven and do not even pass go.

Well, it's time for another apple and a banana.
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    annoyed annoyed

This next nasty message is brought to you by SPRINT

After owenthomas and my sister Jen-Jen forced me to get a cell phone, my life is nothing but hell. So anyhoo, I ended up with a Samsung model which is annoying. I delete stuff all the time because my fingers are too fat to manoeuver the buttons but that's not the real problem. The problem Ladies and Germs is that my phone rings. It rings.

Yes, you may think that's what a cell phone is supposed to do and you are right...well partially right.

But the problem is that it rings during inappropriate times and, pay attention now , with the VIBRATOR FUNCTION ON.

It rings at work when I am having a meeting. It rings during conferences and high-powered, high falutin' people look down on yours truly. It rings at 3AM.

Of course, owenthomas thinks I am going mad. I think I am going mad. owenthomas thinks I don't know what I am talking about and that I just keep turning on the ringer.

He says I am blowing everything out of proportion.

Oh, this is my marriage ladies and gentleman. God forbid, that owenthomas believes that his sacred and hallowed arena of technology could have anything wrong with it. God Forbid.

So I go to the Sprint store on Market here in Frisco (please no comments about Frisco, I'll say what I want. Thank you very much)

I walk in tell the shopgirl what is going on and she tries to fix it. She gets me a new phone and I think the problem is ended.

Oh no!

I attend this conference in LA and right when you could hear a pin drop, my phone wails some idiotic tune. (i think it's called Fuer Else)

When I say wail I mean a loud wailing. At first, I think it couldn't be my phone because my phone is on Vibrate. Everyone stares at me. I pull out my phone but change from my pocket flings all over the place and I can't get it to stop. Some wretched Barbie lookin' bitch asks me in a terse voice to turn it off. I finally hit the right button. You think with my fat fingers I could have done this sooner, eh?

The next day it does the same thing but plays another fascinating Tango-ish tune at screechingly high decibels. I get the look that I always give people who have fantastically stupid melodic aural nightmares of rings.

I finally get home finally to SanFran and go about my business of living.

The next day I am in the office on a WebEx demo when the damn phone goes off, It's across the office and I can't reach it. I bang my knee really hard against the lousy corporate furniture made by idiotic people with obviously no knees. During this fiasco, I thought I had hit the Mute button but no some clients have to hear me say the ef-word- spoken not as loud as my phone rings but audible enough.

I know I am trouble.

I march down to Sprint. Of course, no one believes me. No one. I have suddenly lost my street cred and I am an imbecile in the eyes of the oh-so pleasant people at Sprint. Just another wack job coming into their store.

Some guy looks at it. I know down deep in his heart or hearts that he doesn't believe me. He says he switched something so I leave.

50 minutes later, the phone howls again and in the lovely Beethovenesque tone I have grown to love.

I march down to Sprint. Phone and chord in hand ready to kill. As owenthomas says I am on the warpath.

I throw it down on the counter in front of the manager who listens to my story and then tells me to calm down. He does numerous tests of calling and texting but of course it just vibrates. He also thinks I am a wack job. I can feel it and I am getting pissier. owenthomas calls and I remind him he is in charge of technology and trash and he should be here handling this dolt of a manager.

He soon marches down and retells my story politely. Being proactive, he suggests that maybe the manager could call Tech support and see if there is a problem.

Here's the part I love....well according to the tech support, this model of phone does indeed have a problem with ringing when it wants to. And yes, they have had numerous complaints about this Samsung model.

Do I get an apology? Do I get we'll fix it right away. Oh no, my friends I get a coldish, nasty glare from Dolt the Sprint Store Manager.

What will I get but a "factory reconditioned" read used cell phone. Another model.

I blame this, among other things, on my Sister and owenthomas
  • Current Mood
    infuriated infuriated

University of Homophobes and mean Chicago

Do you hate your spouse's or significant other's alma mater? Do you wish them ill? I do.

Does your spouse's alma mater call and pester you constantly for money?

It all started about 6 months ago when I came home from work in a bitter mood. owenthomas was at work late working hard when the phone rang. I looked at the caller id and it said the University of Chicago. owenthomas has always spoken kindlyover the years of his alma mater so I decided to pick up the phone.

Some man asked to speak to owenthomas and I said he wasn't home but I could help him with updating Owen's profile with the university for the alumni association and gifting programme. The man then said and who is this and I replied that it was his partner. He then asked me if I was his business partner.

I said no. I let him know I was more of the marrying kind, significant other, husband type of partner.

Pregnant pause. He then said, "What are you joking?"

Pregant pause on my part now. "Uh, no, " I replied.

Insert sigh of disgust on his part.

Now insert sigh of disgust on my part.

I then asked him, "Do you want his updated information or not"

"No," he bellowed and hung up the phone.

Of course being who I am, I told owenthomas that his alma mater better not ever call me again and then I told him what happened.

I should have nipped this bullshit in the bud from the start but I went on with my life as that is what I do best.

More phone calls. Calls on Saturdays. Calls after 8PM. Calls wanting money. Calls wanting to update. Calls, calls, and more calls.

I asked them repeatedly not to call and to put us on their "Do Not Call List" but more calls came. I would come home from work and I would see they called. Sometimes they would leave a message- more times not.

Last Thursday I saw that once again the University of Chicago had called. On Friday morning I picked up the phone and called the University of Chicago and I ask for the Alumni and Gifts section of the University. A pleasant woman by the name of Randy Holgate answered the phone.

The Conversation goes something like this....

"Hi, it's Greg and I want you to stop calling me."
"Ok, what seems to be the problem," she asks.
"I am tired of the constant barrage of phone calls from the University of Chicago."

I also recounted for her the story above.
She seemed somewhat shocked but in that kind of stifled Midwest way
She apologises.

I then pointed out to her that if they are asking for $$$$ then they are kind of shooting themselves in the foot when they insult alumni and their significant others. I also pointed out that we are "Double Income, No Kids" (DINKs) and sometimes we do have extra money at the end of the month.

She agreed and apologised again. She then said she would take us off of the call roster. I said great and wished her a good day.

Lo and behold, come Saturday -- the next bloody day and guess who calls?

Yes, the University of Chicago. I told him to put us on their do not call list and never call again.

I am beginning to think my s.o. owenthomas has graduated from Idiot University.

I sometimes read their droll magazine about how many Nobel Laureates they have, about how some alum found the sacred sequence of a duckbill playpus' DNA, or the ramifications on today's woman of some recently unburied pre-historic Welsh midwifery artifacts or other such pedantic subjects.

Smart. Yes, but they sure as hell can't get it together and take us off the calling list.

A cease and desist letter is now on its way...

P.S. Today in the mail, of course there was a letter from guess where? Asking alums to fill in a survey.

University of Chicago...ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!
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    aggravated aggravated

(no subject)

Yes, I am watching "Some Kind of Wonderful" right now and totally grooving to the soundtrack. (I wish I hadn't had the soundtrack stolen at a party.) I loved the film in my teens but it is a total cheesy love story. Eric Stoltz is dreamy as usual, Mary Stuart Masterson is fabulous as the unrequited love interest, and the chick from "Caroline in the City" and "Back to the Future." Maybe her name is Leah Armstrong or something. Oh my God, he just gave her the earrings at the Hollywood Ampitheatre and I am tearing up. Oh no, they are on the way to Hardy's house for the big party. Eric Stoltz' character may get beaten up. Oh no. I caught up in the excitement.

Anyway, I cooked owenthomas his favorite Scallop Soup because he was on Bullseye on CNBC. He was so cute chatting about Wal-Mart and Apple and all the business stuff.

Back to the film, oh, Leah just slapped Hardy across the face at his party. Oh the bad kids have entered now and are gonna party.

So anyway, owenthomas was on CNBC. He was gentlemanly to let some woman yap on and on about something. I wasn't paying attention to her anyway. Thank God I called Annie and Bill to find out about owenthomas being on tv or else I would have missed it.

Back to the scallop soup, it's actually an ancient recipe that my friend Suzanne cooked up one night at one of her fancy parties. It has scallops, lime juice, chicken stock, butter, onions, garlic, ginger, cilantro, mushrooms. It really is gorgeous. I sliced some avocado on the soup for owenthomas. He said it was a great touch. I have to keep my man happy.

Oh, Mary Stuart Masterson and Eric Stoltz are kissing now. My night is complete now. They are walking down the street now. "Mask" is on next- it must be a film salute to that dreamy Eric Stoltz. As soon as owenthomas sees that Cher is in the film, he will jump up and down screaming.

We bought a Xmas tree yesterday with Jen-Jen. Have already decorated it so I am now officially in the holiday spirit. Owen told me he thought we needed an angel for the top of the tree so now I gotta go get one. I have to keep owenthomas happy.

Oh now he wants me to take him to Cozumel. Want, want, want. Is this marriage or what?

I hope you all had a fantastic T-giving.
  • Current Music
    "Some Kind of Wonderful" soundtrack

(no subject)

Bonsoir Darlings!

I am writing to you from New York, New York- so nice they named it twice. owenthomas has had the better end of the deal as he has been shopping and walking Gotham City's streets whilst I slave away a the office. He is spending money like he has it or something! The nerve! I am the shopper in the family. I wanted to write about the fascinating Icelandic Film Festival that took place in San Fran. It was great. My fave film was Cold Fever- a story about a Japanese man who lost his mom and dad in Iceland and how he honoured their lives with a ceremony at the place of their death! SUPERB! The other film was Reykjavik 101. This film was about this loser who falls in love with Victoria Abril's character. Fabulous as well.

I am now in recovery from our Chinese Wedding Banquet that Owen and I had at Yank SIng in San Fran! I have never had so many friends and family in one place. It was absolutely sublime. I didn't get to eat much as I was visiting with everyone. happypete and prettypammie both looked beautiful. Pam was wearing a new beautiful sexy dress and she was stunning! I am so lucky to have fabulous in-laws. Annie, Owen's mother made a beautiful dress for herself and was the belle of the ball! Many people came up to me and said they couldn't believe how big the party was or the large amount of 50 year olds dancing away on the dancefloor! We definitely needed a bigger dance floor! Owen's dad Bill and my father said some very heartfelt things to both of us and I was close to crying many times.

Our buddy Carol Gadsden wrote a beautiful homily and officiated over the ring ceremony as well. I am eternally grateful to her for flying out from Boston. Practically the whole day is a beautiful blur of images and thoughts and I will over time share them with you all.

It's rainy and cold here in New York and I am coming to grips with many the many changes at work but it all seems so trivial as I am sharing my life with the most beautiful man in the world.
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    content content